Dear Friends,
It seems to me, the singular advantage the human race has above all other species, is our capacity for love, and nowhere is that more evident than in the family. We are nurtured, protected and taught by our family. It is within the family that we learn to cooperate, share, act selflessly and indeed, love. Without the lessons we learn from our siblings, mothers, fathers, beloved aunts, and uncles, without those important lessons we would become barbarians. That is why the most touching stories are about orphans. A “brave new world” would not produce people capable of being civilized but only automatons, walking in a fog through life, wills crushed, hopeless, helpless and without mercy for one another. The family then should be protected at all costs as it is a font of humanity itself.
The world does not care about your existence let alone your feelings. Set a random man down in the wilderness, alone and without tools, and he will surely perish. Only in those places where the temperature stays moderate all the time, water is plentiful and food is easily available can a man survive naked, anyplace else, and let’s face it, every where is other than such an Eden, has as it’s singular purpose to kill you and I. If it is warm enough to survive, there are every manner of poisonous spider, snake and scorpion lurking, where they cannot live, we could freeze to death on a summer night. The world is set against our very survival and it is only through our tenacity, intelligence, skill and cunning that we have even survived, let alone thrived. Why then should a world that actively seeks our very destruction care about our feelings?
Whenever we see those poor souls in utter misfortune, you know they are separated from their family. The homeless come immediately to mind. People only become homeless because they do not have family to take them in, or if their family is too selfish to. It is within the protection of the family that we find shelter from the world’s most horrible wages. Most homeless have mild to severe emotional disorders, or are in the lower percentile of intelligence, and so have no place in a self centered society, especially in a world that seeks their death… except the family. A statistic we don’t ever see, and I wager will never see, is the number of people with mental illness and are functionally retarded, cared for by their family. The vast majority of are cared for with love and familiarity. Those who are dutiful to family then, discourage the worst outcomes for not only their own loved ones, but society as a whole and the human race by extension.
We are born not only fragile but needy as well. Babies can die if they are not held… even if all their other needs are met in spades. We, as human beings need love. It is as vital to our well being as food, water and air. Our uncles take us hunting, our aunts teach us sewing, our grandparents teach us family lore while our parents give us unconditional love, and do their best to civilize us, so people will not shun us when we get older. No other invention could teach such lessons as effectively as the family. There are some who say that those lessons could be taught by force, pain and usurped autocracy, rather than the family method of, softness, love, caring, and genuine God given authority, but I disagree. Moreover, our need for love, if not met early in life, leads to emotional disorders, which then lead to poor personal outcomes, like homelessness. Once one considers all the angles, the nuclear family must be protected and nurtured, it becomes a self interested solution.
Obviously, most of us are denied some facet of family, we may be missing our grandparents, lacking uncles, aunts, even parents and siblings. Each loss, even if we never knew them, diminishes the richness, familiarity, comfort and love we experience in our lives. As we age, we lose more and more of our family but at the same time we gain as well. Children add to our lives by giving us purpose and joy. They renew our zest for life simply by being around them. In the end we have to figure our gain is worth as much as our loss. Even if our loss is unbearable. Thankfulness for our time with our loved ones, gratitude for the ones we still have, and anticipation for those loved ones to join us in the future, is what makes healing possible. Every one of us will lose a loved one. The world cares nothing for our well being. That is up to us and our family. So, thank God for your family, no matter how messed up each of them are, they think the same of you… and all of you are right, so be generous with your love to your family, because there isn’t one of us who deserves it, nor one of us who doesn’t need it.
Sincerely,
John Pepin